My 5 Gifts

I am not exactly a talented person. Unless you considered brushing teeth in record time a talent, I have nothing much to boast about. But every now and then I have marvelled at a few things that I think I am very good at. It might not be worth much but I thought I should share the secret of their perfect execution. It might help a few people feel good about themselves.

1. The shampoo mohawk : This is a guys' special. The trick is to have just the right amount of water and shampoo in your hair followed by a swift motion of cupped palms to form that perfect mohawk. I discovered quite early in life that I was gifted at this and I have perfected the art over 2 decades . My hair is thinning but my spirit stays thick. As long as there is even a single strand of hair on my head , the shampoo mohawk shall continue to be formed - shower after shower.

2. The slurp: How do you tell someone that you really like the food that has been served ? Well, there are various ways to do this , ranging from the very boring "I like it" to the really confusing, and utterly embarrassing , " mmmm... Yes... OMG!" but there's nothing as good as the impeccable SLURP . Zero words, zero embarrassment , one hundred percent efficient communication. It's rather difficult to teach this on the blog , but it should suffice to know that it involves an intricate twist of the tongue and a rapid suction of air into the mouth. And yes, hours of practice to get that touch of perfection.

3. Singing a song , in my head : I swear I am out of the world when it comes to this . It's a pity no one can hear me. You name a song, any song, and I'll croon like a canary ,complete with chorus and all the instruments ( including the bass ). Just that it'll all be in my head and I wouldn't be able to delight you with it. Now all we need is some science genius to find a way to project this to the world outside. For the world's benefit of course.

4. The tongue roll : People make it to the Guinness for doing stupid things to themselves like popping their eyeballs out and swallowing metal objects. I too have a talent in this category and it's definitely not as ridiculous. I can roll my tongue from both sides into a perfect cylinder. It's not an eyesore and is completely safe for kids to try at home. I can't comment on the usefulness of this act though but then I never said I was going to talk about useful stuff, did I ?

5. The scooter toot orchestra : Dad gifted me a scooter when I turned 16 and I discovered that there was more to the 2 wheeler than just driving it around. I realised I could toot in a delightful melody. If there were a toot genre of music, I would be a Tootstar. I have moved to driving a car since, but my sense of toot music has stayed with me. Sometimes, when I am in a good mood, I play the toot music with my car's horn. It's not as mesmerising as the toot, but it gets me all the attention from the bewildered traffic around. Chuckle.

Suddenly , I feel very buoyant, very confident. May be I should write books on each of my Fab Five , may be they will go on to become best sellers , may be I'll win a booker's (for each one of them ) .I think, I have a 6th talent too. Let's call it hopeless optimism ( I know that doesn't make any sense).

Image source: google images